Juz cum back from choa chu kang lor..haha..went sha mu todae..lst time in mi 18 years lor..so excited..early in the morning I waked up at 3am..then waited 4 mum 2 prepare mani thingys b4 setting off..wow..never travel so early in the morning b4..the expressways was so damn foggy lor..esp when it’s getting nearer to the cemetery..haha..sound eerie? Okie..then lotsa interesting thingy happened..n in fact..i gained lotsa knowledge bout tombs..hahah..heavy traffic jams..then some cars stuck in the mud..n mani guys..act strong lor..trying 2 push the car out of it..saw a no of cute guys..hahah..then..of coz went 2 @@ mi grandpa 4 the lst time..he was dead b4 I was borned..so sad..tink he muz b super happie todae tt I went 2 @@ him..hahah..or ya..there r mani thingys interesting bout the tombs..hmm..gt diff designs n diff meaning lor..most tombs gt the small lions at the side..which is mostly 4 guys..n most female ones gt the flowers..it’s is called water lily? dunno lar..juz flower..then dose vv old tombs lyk dose died in the 70s..the tombs r super big lor..n super cramp..then dose relatives can’t even walk 2 the tombs lor..dey hav 2 climb over other ppl tombs too..haha..some even pray on top of the tombs..oh ya..then I saw one guy praying 2 a tomb then another one bside it..then I was telling mi mum..wow..his grandpa n grandma died on the same dae..so romantic..hahah..then mi mum told mi coz..tt guy wanted to invite his grandpa’s neighbours 2 share n enjoy the “feast” too..hahha..some interesting lor..so fun lor..xcept 4 the traffic jam lar..it sucks..when we went home..we saw ppl stuck at the junction at the beginning of Choa Chu Kang..haha..we r lucky n we went early..so we r onli stuck at the cemetery itself..n nt outside..wow..shld @@ the cemetery when the sky is dark in the morning..when ppl shining their torchlights..super eerie..but vv fun..hahah..nxt time wana go again..despite of the scorching sun n the stoopid jam..

Oh ya..juz read kl’s mesg…made mi tink of mi situation too..haiz..sianz..juz dun wana tok bout it too..wana give up..since last yr..nw? he’s still in mi heart..haiz..wat can I do?
When mi heart insisting on holding..some might say I’m stooping. Some might sae I’m crazy.But dey can never noe wat it was lyk. They can never know how it felt..I’ll keep on loving..Most ppl call mi pathetic..Most ppl call mi insane..But dey can never noe wat I’m gg through.They will never see wat I sae.They will never feel the way I feel. So, I’ll juz keep on holding..so kl..i understand hw u feel n I oso dunno hw 2 treat it coz I can’t treat myself too..i noe..i understand the feelings.,.it’s reallie hard to let go someone hu has touched ur life, but it hurts even more to sae gdbye 2 someone hu was never yours and yet changed your life the most..but still..it’s better to give up the feeling rather than to fight, knowing tt u r the onli one fighting..esp when u dun wana tell him hw u feel..personally I feel tt he ought to noe lor..but still time will heal all wounds..it juz depends on hw long it’ll take..

Spend last nite toking to bb..kinda consoling him bout the mct thingy..telling him trying to b optimistic all dese..when I noe it’s impossible to do so..whatever..i reallie dunno hw 2 console ppl.,.i’m super bad at tt..i can’t console w/o telling them lies..juz telling them on the gd side of thingys..is nt reality..is nt mi habit of doing..still as a gd fren I wish him best of luck..i reallie dun wana miss @@ing him 4 the rest of the yr in tjc..